The Enemy

This occurred sometime during the week, I think it was after my son talked with his mom on the phone.

She told him she was going to pick him up, and, somehow I said Wednesday or something to that nature, and responded with “your enemy” when he talked about her. 

It hurt like hell; “Why?” he still hold her up as one of the top 3 people in his life, and, for him to call her the enemy when he talked to me about her, hurt me, because, I knew that it took a lot out of him to say that about his mother, my ex-wife.

The Hurt, about the comment, The Enemy, was not that I do not consider her to be the enemy, but rather that he cannot see the hurt on myside, the disappointment and the injury, and, within the first two to three years of the divorce, I did with fury see her as the enemy, but, now I see her with pity because the judgement of God has been executed on her. 

He is hurting and confused emotionally; and, for him, it was not a good thing to say.  So my response is to pray for the hurt my son is feeling or should be feeling, while acknowledging the Lord’s will be done, even when Judgement is being executed against “The Enemy”. 

God Bless

El enemigo

Esto ocurrió en algún momento durante la semana, creo que fue después de mi hijo habló con su madre por teléfono.

Ella le dijo que iba a recogerlo, y, de algún modo que dije el miércoles o algo haci, y respondió con "el enemigo" cuando hablaba de ella.

Me dolió como el infierno; "¿Por qué?" Él todavía abrazara ella como uno de los 3 mejores personas en su vida, y, para que él la llamara al enemigo cuando él me habló de ella, me dolió, porque yo sabía que tomó mucho de él para decir lo mismo de su madre, mi ex esposa.

The Hurt, por el comentario, el enemigo, no era que no considero que ella sea el enemigo, sino que no puede ver el dolor por mi vista y lado, la decepción y la herida, y, dentro de los primeros dos a tres años de el divorcio, lo hice con furia la ven como el enemigo, pero, ahora que la veo con pena, porque el juicio de Dios ha sido ejecutado en ella.

Él está herido y confundido emocionalmente; y, para él, no era una buena cosa que decir. Así que mi respuesta es orar por el dolor que mi hijo se siente o debería estar sintiendo, al tiempo que reconoce el Señor de voluntad, incluso cuando se está ejecutando juicio contra "el enemigo".

Dios le bendiga

¿Quién soy? Soy cristiano; salvado, santificado, lleno desde 1985. Soy padre de tres hijos, (dos son biológica). Soy discapacitado, con parálisis cerebral desde su nacimiento. Yo uso una silla de ruedas pero yo ando. Estoy bien educada, tengo una Maestría en Ciencias Políticas. Tengo una Bachelors de Arte en Sociología / Estudios Puertorriqueños. Yo soy un puertorriqueño por luz en la isla. He estado desempleado desde 2010 a raíz de una herida en el trabajo. Soy divorciado desde 2013 porque mi ex esposa me dejó por su novio. Busco empleo, en cualquier lugar. Yo preferiría empleo a tiempo parcial, pero, a tiempo completo es la mejor. Me presenté y presenté e hice todo lo que pude para conseguir la manutención de niños desde mi ex esposa. Me presenté y hice todo lo que pudo para post-separación apoyo / pensión alimenticia. Lo que encontré es el sistema judicial no es lo que es todo lo bueno como parece, hay una sensación distorsionada e irreal de la justicia. Por lo tanto, tomé dos años el valor de los estudios jurídicos. ¿Se puede ayudar con un trabajo o fondos? ¿Puedo ayudarte? Estas son las dos preguntas más importantes que deben ser respondidas por usted y por mí y Dios Todopoderoso. Por favor, oren si lo haría y Dios los bendiga.

Who Am I?

I am a Christian; saved, sanctified, filled since 1985.

I am a father of three children, (two are biological).

I am Disabled, with cerebral palsy since birth.

I use a wheelchair but I do walk.

I am well educated, I have a Master of Arts in Political Science.

I have a Bachelor of Arts in Sociology/Puerto Rican Studies.

I am a Puerto Rican by birth Native to the Island.

I have been unemployed since 2010 following a workplace injury.

I am divorced since 2013 because my ex-wife left me for her boyfriend. 

I am looking for employment, just about anywhere.

I would prefer part-time employment, but, full time is best. 

I filed and filed and did everything I could to get the right child support from my ex-wife. 

I filed and did everything I could to get post-separation support/alimony. 

What I found is the court system is not what it is all cracked up to be, there is a distorted and unreal sense of justice. 

Hence, I took two years worth of legal studies. 

Can you help with a Job or Funds?

Can I help you?

These are the two most important questions to be answered by you and me and God Almighty.

Please pray if you would and God Bless.  

Some helpful links include the local court system. Some of the local rules for family court can be found on the NC Courts Website.  That includes the local rules and local family courts.

http://www.nccourts.org/

SSA, the Social Security Administration has its own website for Social Security Cards, Disability and Retirement Benefits, and dependent benefits.

https://www.ssa.gov

The most common services are Medicaid and Food Stamps.  You can find information about local programs on the State Website.

http://www.ncdhhs.gov

The US Child Support Office have their own website and information.

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/css

While, NC Child Support has more specific information.

http://www.ncchildsupport.com

The general NC Website is:

http://www.nc.gov

Immigration Matter may be found on:

http://www.uscis.gov/

¿Qué es un moción?

¿Qué diablos es eso?

Una moción es cuando le dices a la corte que usted quiere que haga algo.

Supuestamente, el tribunal sólo es motivado para hacer las cosas, cuando le dices a la corte lo que quiere y cómo quiere que se haga.

El tribunal puede y hace cosas por su cuenta, pero prefiere que usted le indique qué hacer.

Así pues, usted quiere que sus hijos estén con usted cada dos fines de semana, pero, usted decide solicitar cada fin de semana, sabiendo muy bien lo que desea es cada dos fines de semana, y no se puede acomodar a tener a sus hijos cada fin de semana.

Así que usted se mueve, pedir al tribunal, presentar una moción, a tener sus hijos con usted cada fin de semana, mientras que sólo los quiere una parte del tiempo. Una de varias cosas pueden suceder; se obtiene lo que quiere, o no consigues lo que quieres.

Si obtiene el escenario cada fin de semana y decide no obtener de la otra persona todas las semanas los niños, y el tribunal ordenó que lo haga, y luego te metes en problemas y se penales de la corte. La práctica más grande y mejor sólo es pedir lo que quiere y puede manejar. No pedir cosas o arreglos que harán la vida difícil.

El tribunal va a volver y no aceptar el argumento de la mayor parte del tiempo que no se podía llevar a los niños según lo ordenado, porque, usted hizo la petición. Eso es como hornear un pastel a ti mismo, y culpar a alguien más para que no se cocinan bien. Bueno, al horno, te lo buscaste, lo tienes, ahora, ir a la cárcel o se enfrentan penales de la cort.

Mi mayor problema fue ir corte una vez, el padre de mi hijastra se declaró custodia completo, y yo estaba en la sala del tribunal con mi ahora ex esposa, y, el padre solicitó la custodia completa. Bueno, él se rompió en pedazos por el juez, porque no quería que nuestra hijastra vivir con él a tiempo completo, o quedarse con él cada fin de semana. Él no tenía el espacio, un pequeño apartamento, o tiempo para ocuparse de su propia hija.

El juez rompió en él, y dijo finalmente, en el estrado, sólo la quiero conmigo cada dos fines de semana. La custodia completa frente a cada fin de semana, son dos situaciones totalmente diferentes. Dios bendiga.

What is a Motion?

What the heck is that?

A motion is when you tell the court you want it to do something.

Supposedly, court is only motivated to do things, when you tell the court what you want and how you want it to be done. 

The court can and does do things on its own, but prefers you tell it what to do. 

So, you want your kids to be with you every-other weekend, but, you decide to ask for every weekend, knowing full well you want just every other weekend, and you cannot accommodate having your kids every weekend.

So you move, ask the court, file a motion, to have your kids with you every weekend, while you only want them part of the time.  One of several things can happen; you get what you want, or you do not get what you want. 

If you get the every weekend scenario and decide not to get them from the other party every week, and the court ordered you to do so, then you get in trouble and face a show cause hearing and contempt hearing.  The biggest and best practice is only ask for what you want and can handle.  Do not ask for things or arrangements that will make your life difficult. 

The court will come back and not accept your argument most of the time that you could not get the kids as ordered, because, you made the request.  That is like baking a cake yourself, and blaming someone else for it not being cooked right.  Well you baked it, you asked for it, you got it,  now, go to jail or face getting out of contempt. 

My biggest problem was going to court one time, the father of my stepdaughter filed for custody, and I was in the court room with my now ex-wife, and, the father filed for full custody.  Well, he was tore to pieces by the judge, because, he did not want our step-daughter to live with him full time, or to stay with him every weekend.  He did not have the space, a small apartment, or time to deal with his own daughter. 

The judge tore into him, and he finally said, on the stand, I only want her with me every other weekend.  Full custody versus every other weekend are two totally different scenarios.  God Bless. 

It Was Hard

Me and my son talked for a while, and it was hard.
We left out home, to go to grandma, to check up on her, to see if her yard was plowed.

This was the first year that I did not plow my own house, by myself. Both Kids were/are old enough to get out there and help, and they did. So, my main walk ways were cleared from snow, and quickly. And, I felt the years knowing in the past I did it all by myself and quickly. I was proud of both my son and daughter, Adriana and Elijah.

So, we finish our stuff, and take a run to check on grandma. We had no power in our home, but, because I knew the power was going to be out, I prepared. I set the thermostat to 80 in the house, and got out the back up heating and cooking stuff. Always set your refrigerator to max cool too. It freezes the food, but frozen food keeps for hours and thaws quickly when the power is out.

While our neighbors had to flee their home and/or endure 40 and 55 degree temperatures in the house, We stayed at 65 for a while, and just before the power came back on it was 60 degrees, being out from 12AM to 6PM.
So we go up to grandma, and, nothing was plowed.

Grandpa decided to put cat litter on the top of 1 inch of compacted Ice and snow. It would have been easily removed when it was still wet, but, now it was time to chop that ice.

I took the wheelchair out of the van, and my shovel, and we used grandpa’s plastic shovel, and we, me and my son, began to clear the way; he ended up chopping with the ice chopper. We cleared her entrance and made a spot so that a car can pull in and unload a person and not need to walk on ice. We got down to the cement driveway, and, I had a half a bag of salt with me to finish the job. We made a path, even to grandpa’s car, and salted the whole thing.

Meanwhile, we were pissed. Grandpa was inside watching television. But I told my son not to worry, but Elijah was livid [that all he does is watch TV, he said]. Meanwhile, I guess grandma and grandpa argued, because he rushed out to try to clean some, but told us to stop because he had placed cat litter on the ice. Insanity, yes, early signed of being senile. We kept on going regardless of the accusations like, that is my shovel, grandpa said, the very shovel I bought in 2001. I had to visually cue my son just not to say anything and keep on working; we did and grandpa left. Grandpa has been in another world lately, so we had left early, at 3:30 instead of 6:00 PM, just to keep the peace.

The moral of the story is this, my mom had 7 kids total. We drive over 45 minutes in snow to get to grandma. There are a whole bunch of grand-kids. And, one son lives ten minutes away, while the other lives 15 minutes away. So, why is it the cripple son, with two kids, has to drive to Cary to shovel snow, when both of the other sons are not cripple, and healthy and without kids in the home. You all go figure that crapper out. And we still make food runs to grandma, when she says she is hungry and has no food.

I am not sure what is wrong with this picture, but can y’all help me understand what the heck I am doing wrong. The last thing I told my son is grandpa is old and should not have to shovel snow when both have younger more able bodied children, and grandchildren, that can do so. God Bless.